ref: 0056fbe826dbecc5d7ae863d7c4178e96c75b8d4
parent: cda0d5e1539073051b8a8f354d6bbfc4fe946c3d
author: Kurt H Maier <khm@intma.in>
date: Mon Oct 1 16:22:57 EDT 2012
Rules of Acquisition
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+1 Once you have their money, you never give it back.
+3 Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.
+6 Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.
+7 Keep your ears open.
+9 Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.
+10 Greed is eternal.
+16 A deal is a deal.
+17 A contract is a contract is a contract ... but only between Ferengi.
+18 A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.
+21 Never place friendship above profit.
+22 A wise man can hear profit in the wind.
+23 Nothing is more important than your health ... except for your money.
+31 Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother.
+33 It never hurts to suck up to the boss.
+34 War is good for business
+35 Peace is good for business. TNG: "The Perfect Mate";
+45 Expand or die.
+47 Never trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.
+48 The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.
+57 Good customers are as rare as latinum. Treasure them.
+59 Free advice is seldom cheap.
+62 The riskier the road, the greater the profit.
+74 Knowledge equals profit.
+75 Home is where the heart is, but the stars are made of latinum.
+76 Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies.
+94 Females and finances don't mix.
+95 Expand or die.
+98 Every man has his price.
+102 Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever.
+103 Sleep can interfere with...
+109 Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.
+111 Treat people in your debt like family ... exploit them.
+112 Never have sex with the boss's sister.
+125 You can't make a deal if you're dead.
+139 Wives serve, brothers inherit.
+168 Whisper your way to success.
+ - A man is only worth the sum of his possessions.
+190 Hear all, trust nothing.
+194 It's always good to know about new customers before they walk in your door.
+203 New customers are like razor-toothed gree-worms. They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back.
+208 Sometimes the only thing more dangerous than a question is an answer.
+211 Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success. Don't hesitate to step on them.
+214 Never begin a negotiation on an empty stomach.
+217 You can't free a fish from water.
+223 (incomplete, but presumably concerned the relationship between "keeping busy" and "being successful")
+229 Latinum lasts longer than lust.
+239 Never be afraid to mislabel a product.
+263 Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum.
+285 No good deed ever goes unpunished.
+286 When Morn leaves, it's all over.
+299 After you've exploited someone, it never hurts to thank them. That way, it's easier to exploit them next time.
+ – Exploitation begins at home.
+(The unwritten rule) When no appropriate rule applies, make one up.
+ – When the messenger comes to appropriate your profits ... kill the messenger.
+ – Time, like latinum, is a highly limited commodity.
+ – Always inspect the merchandise before making a deal.
+ – Money is money, but females are better.
+ – Why ask, when you can take?
+ – A good lie is easier to believe than the truth.
+ – If that's what's written, then that's what's written.
+STAGES OF ACQUISITION: Infatuation: An unreasoning love or attraction … "I want it." Justification: Moral excuse used to explain … "I must have it!" Appropriation: To take to one's self in exclusion of others … "IT'S MINE AT LAST!" Obsession: A compulsive or irrational preoccupation … "My Precious!" Resale: The action of selling something previously bought … "Make me an offer."
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